How do you talk to a 3 year old about guns?

[dws1117]

Where do you start?

My son has started to making all things into guns. He will go up to you with his "gun" or one of the toy guns he has and point it at you and say "I have my gun, and I am going to kill you with my gun. Bang, Bang, your're dead. I killed you."

My wife called me at work today and told me that he found my nightstand gun. She said he picked it up and tried to pul the trigger. Fortunately I keep the magazine out of the gun. I know that if I need it that it will be harder to bring the gun into a ready condition. Looks like we will be getting a gun vault tonight. We also keep the bedroom door locked when we are not in the room. He is not in there without one or both of us.

We have talked to him some about guns. He will even give us the right answers when we ask him what to do if he finds a gun. He will tell us that he is not to touch it and to go tell Mommy or Daddy. We have even tested him by leaving a known empty gun out. Each time he passed the test.

What he did the morning has me thinking that what I am doing isn't working. I am at a loss at to which way to go.

[Jungle Work]

It all depends on the maturity of the child. My oldest Grandson and Granddaughter started shooting when they were almost four years of age.
They were required to discuss the word "responsibility" and "Safety" and tell me as best they could what it means. In addation they had to act in a responsible manner. Both wanted to shoot and were apt pupils with the BB Guns and later .22lr pistols and rifles.

My son started shooting .22lr and centerfire pistols at the age of three. He had spent many hours with me while I was cleaning my duty pistol and he cleaning his toy pistol. He learned safety early on before touching a real firearm. When we went to the range. a private LE Range, he would shoot for a while and then go chase bugs and look for rocks. He used to come and fire qualification rounds with his pistol when the PD I was Chief at qualified with their weapons. I had to stop him from shooting with the officers and he was the high shooter all the time. It hurt some of the officers feelings to have a 14 year old boy beat them. He's still a shooter.

I don't mind teaching children how to shoot, but they must exibit the maturity to learn responsibility and safety. My son in law is also a police officers and once when he was working midnights, my daughter thought she heard a prowler, she got her 3 inch Model 65 and went to check the doors to make sure they were locked. She then returned to bed and laid the pistol on the night stand. Early the next morning she was awoke by my grandson pulling on her arm. He looked at her and said, "Great news, the Tooth Fairy has left us a new pistol". He's ten now, very active in sports and a natural shot.

By the same token I have a seven year old granddaughter and a four year old granddaughter that I let shoot BB guns, but they are not ready for real guns.

Jungle Work

[dolanp]

Admittedly I have no experience myself, but I will pass on something I've read. If you can take the child shooting somewhere, be it a range or whatever, it can really impress upon them how powerful and deadly the object is when used. Even if they are too young to shoot on their own, the loud BANG of the gun and the effects of the bullet on its target can go a long way on children since they tend to pick up things visually at early ages. They will have a fear and respect for the power of it and be more likely to heed your warnings of what to do when they see one. Until they know what it is capable of they won't really be aware of the consequences of breaking your rules.

[Kalrog]

My son is almost 3 and I want to take him shooting so that he knows how powerful guns really are. Right now all he knows about them is that everything he picks up is a gun and he shoots things. He doesn't understand that shooting things (for real) hurts them, so that is a lesson that I want to teach him - maybe by killing some evil watermellons. But he isn't ready for that yet. He knows the rules and he will tell them to you, but he doesn't understand how to put them into practice yet. When he does, he will get that range trip with me and maybe get to shoot a .22 or bb gun.

Hopefully he will be able to go to the range with me in a year or two, but he isn't ready yet.

[Braden]

I was in 3rd grade when I saw the damage that a .410 shotgun would do to a pumpkin. That made a lasting impression. I had been shooting a BB gun long before my dad taught me to shoot the over/under .22/.410 that day.

I've been thinking about this topic for a short while now because my son is approaching the age of two. He obviously isn't ready to start shooting, but he has seen daddy with is gun...whether it be cleaning or holstering up before we leave or whatever. While he doesn't go around "shooting" at stuff with it, he has taken to this accessory for our vacuum cleaner that looks very similar to a gun. He carries it around the house and tries to stick it in his pants at 3 o'clock (because he's seen me holter up I presume). I've got him watching Eddie Eagle already, but I have to always be aware that he's watching my every move.

I'll soon be getting a safe to put on the nightstand. Right now I just sit my holstered Glock on the nightstand when I go to bed....but we have child locks on his door so he can't get out of his room at night. The day is quickly approaching when he'll figure out how to beat those child locks.

DWS, I think in your case it is time to show your son what a real gun will do. I don't know that he's ready for shooting, but he at least needs to see the damage that guns can cause. Seeing that and hearing the blast makes a big impression on kids.

On that note, I read on a forum somewhere where someone said the best thing to do to teach them to respect guns is to let them fire one round through a gun that has lots of recoil and lots of bang. I'm not sure that's the best idea (because it could potentially turn them away from guns forever), but I thought it was worth noting. That's probably not the way I'd approach it though.

[Scott Murray]

I remember being very uncomfortable watching my young children point toy guns at us.

I'd go to them, and say something like: "You don't want to shoot people! You don't want to kill your father (mother, sister, etc)! Guns are for hunting dangerous animals. Would you like to go on a bear hunt?" Then we'd go hunting down a dark hallway to a bedroom, and blast an imaginary monster hiding in a corner.

As they grew older, we shot .22's, and then larger calibers.

All five of them have shown a healthy respect for firearms. They were happy to follow the safety rules. The youngest is now 13. The oldest three enjoy shooting pistols with me. I still need to work on the younger two.

[Jungle Work]

Shooting gallon milk jugs filled with water and red food coloring are fine ways to impress your childeren what a firearm will do and how powerful they are.
Just use a .223 rilfle or larger, Impressive for young children. Tell this is what a firearm will do to them if they shoot them selves with it or shoot they friends with it.

It's also advisable to tell your children what to do if they are at a friends house and the friend pull out his daddy's or mommy's gun.

Jungle Work

[Kalrog]

Just use a .223 rilfle or larger

Don't have a rifle. Was thinking either a 12Ga with a slug or a .44Mag with a 180gr bullet @ about 1800fps. Either of those should do a number on a pumpkin / watermellon / water jug.

[Jungle Work]

Kalrog,
I sure a Shotgun slug or a .44 mag would be suitably impressive for an adult or a child.

My son and daughters are in their late 20s and early 30s and all say they remember me shooting the milk jugs and telling them "this is what will happen to you or your friends if you play with a real gun".
Grandchildren that are shooters seemed suitably impressed, but that will be a wait and see as they approach adulthood.

Jungle Work

[Chris]

my 3.5 year old daughter loves going to gun shows. my 2 year old daughter likes to help me clean them. i haven't ever caught them touching them. my rifles are in the cabinet, but my pistols stay out of their reach.

my oldest daughter wants a purple gun. girls. :)