When your SO has a different view...

[Jusme]

So as not to hijack a previous thread, where the topic was broached, I was wondering how some of the forum members, handle the situation when, and if your significant other has a different attitude towards LTC, OC, or CC on a daily basis? I don't just mean wives, there may be some ladies out there who's husbands/boyfriends may also have a different outlook.

I feel fortunate in that Mrs. Jusme, was raised with guns in her house, at one time she was a guard in a privately run prison, and actually had some limited firearms training, mostly with a shotgun. However, she had also worked for many years in law enforcement, mostly at the administrative level, and had been ingrained with the prevailing wisdom, that only LEOs should carry guns around with them, and unless they were hunting, or involved in some other activity, civilians should leave their guns at home.
When I first decided to pursue my CHL, she was not overly enthusiastic, not because she felt I was irresponsible, but because she still held onto the idea that anyone carrying a gun, was just looking for trouble. I patiently explained that my attitude, demeanor, and role as a peacekeeper would stay intact, that I would do everything within my power to avoid any physical confrontation, and that using my gun in self defense or defense of others, would be my last resort.

I introduced her to some people who had their CHL, some of whom she already knew but didn't know they were licensed carriers. I was able to put her mind at ease, and took the class.
Since then she has gotten much more comfortable with the idea that I will always be armed, with the exception of school activities etc.

The only disagreement we had was earlier this year when more 30.06 and 30.07 signs went up, and I refused to enter a business that had posted both signs. I told her that I was not going to disarm, just to patronize a business that had competition that was more 2A friendly. She felt that I was being too paranoid, however with the recent attacks across this country, and around the world, I point out that the majority of them occur when the victims are prohibited by law from defending themselves. She has come to realize that although the odds may be small, that we will ever be in a situation that requires me to use my gun in self defense, she has begun to look for signs, has become much more SA whenever we go out, and if I am CC, she will reach over and tap my hip to make sure I have my gun, if she didn't see me put it on.
So, to make a long OP short, my wife is fully on board with LTC and is planning on getting hers soon. I don't know if she will carry daily, and will probably never OC, but I plan to support her all the way.

Any other stories out there?

[JMod45]

My in-laws are questionably anti-gun, so my wife did not grow up around them like I did. She has always been a bit uncomfortable around guns for this reason. We have talked a lot about guns, and why I prefer to carry, and she has become a lot more comfortable at this point. The benefit I had from her growing up away from guns, is that I got to teach her the proper safety and handling of firearms, as opposed to trying to re-teach bad habits. She actually went and got her CHL at the same time I did, mainly in case she ever needs to hold it for me for some reason. She has only carried a handful of times so far, but I expect her to carry more often now that campus carry is about to be legal.

Now that she is comfortable around pistols, we bought an AR-15. That has started a new era of explanations at the house, which we are still going through now. Of course, a lot of that is, "You bought what?!" lol

[flowrie]

My SO would not touch a firearm until after Sandy Hook. After that she quickly obtained her LTC (was a CHL then) and I took her to Cabelas to let her pick out a pistol. She selected a Beretta 92 compact. I eventually picked out a Shield, Once she tried the Shield, she took my Shield and she sold the Beretta. She liked the Shield much more and instructed me to go buy another Shield. She reasoned that if something happened we would both be familiar with the same hardware. She always reminds me to carry (not that I forget that often). If it is church, movies, dining out, whatever, she only wants to go to CC friendly places. So, a very significant change in attitude.

[jb2012]

I have been seeing a girl recently, and I really don't ever tell anyone that I do carry, and usually just tend to keep it to myself. We went to dinner a couple of weeks ago and randomly the topic of campus carry came up and she asked me a few things, I answered it all and she agreed that it was definitely a good thing; her having no clue that I was carrying at that times, and have done so several times with her already. As we were leaving, I wasn't paying attention to what side I had her on vs my right hip, and after wrapping my arm around her she bumped into it and immediately jumped back. AHHHH dang it, I thought this one was about to go south... She asked me what it was, and I asked her what she thought it was. She immediately responded with "Oh cool, I didn't know you carried?" and that was pretty much the end of it. Occasionally she'll rub up against it, but she never even blinks.

[Pawpaw]

She sounds like she might be a keeper!

[Soccerdad1995]

My wife and I are on opposite sides of the fence on a few things, including guns. When we met, she was deathly afraid of guns to the point where she even objected to my having a box of ammo lying on the coffee table. She was certain that ammo could spontaneously explode with a force that would surely destroy everything in a 3 block radius

We agreed to disagree, with a compromise that I not let her son (we both have kids from other marriages) touch any of my guns, or even see them if possible. My daughters have both been shooting since they were 7, and they were used to helping me disassemble, clean and reassemble my guns, so that horse was already out of the barn with them.

Over time, I have managed to move her a bit closer to reality. She no longer objects to my carrying when we go out, although she strongly prefers CC to OC. From time to time, she will ask whether I really "need" to carry a gun just to go to XYZ place, but I usually just ignore her and strap on the holster. That's not to say that we don't still have occasional issues, usually triggered by my refusal to eat at a place that has 30.06 posted.

[Nano]

Five years ago my wife and I got a dog. The only time we had to walk him was in the late evening or at night. We discussed buying a handgun for protection. I told her that I would need to get a CHL. Bought a Beretta Nano and took the course. From then on I conceal carried every where it was legal to. She always said she felt safer when we went some where and I was carrying. Occasionally she would go to the range with me and shoot the Nano and the newly acquired LCP. She was an excellent shot with both guns. She wasn't really interested in getting her CHL until a couple, who were very good friends, decided to get their LTC. So, she went with them in April of this year and got hers also. She now occasionally carries the LCP. The last time we went to the range she was shooting "her" LCP but I couldn't get her to shoot my XDs45. Yeah, I know, bought another gun. I tried to tell her that the LCP is more punishing than the XDs but she wasn't buying it. Great gal I married.

[oljames3]

My wife has only recently begun to carry her Ruger LCR .38 regularly. We attended CHL class and got our plastic together in May, 2013. She does not shy aware from firearms and is an excellent shot with her pistol and my Tanfoglio BTA90. She just did not feel like carrying regularly.

I didn't push. Just continued to set the example by carrying openly all day long, every day, everywhere. I have shared with her some of my military experiences and what I see as my current mission as a sheepdog. Her situational awareness has improved greatly. She as become accustomed to my pointing out signs and exits. We've watched the news and discussed local, national, and world events. She decided for herself to carry.

This is to be expected. If I had thought she would be otherwise, she would not have become my wife.

[jason812]

When my wife and I first got together I was extreme for keeping a gun with me in the car or loaded on the night stand. After each mass killing or robbery or mugging reported, I would ask her if the victims probably wish they had a gun. Eventually it must have worked because she got LTC a couple of years before I did and she carries every where she goes.

Now I'm just extreme for keeping an AR with me at all times. I'm still working on her needing to get her own AR.

[rentz]

We don't exactly see things the same in my home, she isn't against the hobby but doesn't understand the need to carry ...yet sometimes she's totally for it if we're going on a road trip of a sketchy area. At times I've had the "youre paranoid " thrown at me and ask why I'm "gun crazy" ....which really I'm not I might make a couple purchases a year if that. But all in all I get to do my thing.

I'd probably get more range time in if we both shared the hobby but she has 0 interest

[Dave2]

I'm hypothetically married to my hypothetical wife, not my gun.

That said, I doubt I'd want to marry someone too immature to acknowledge that we don't live in a safe world (watch me meet the woman of dreams tomorrow, except she'll be one of those "no guns ever for any reason" people).

[C-dub]

My wife and I agree on just about everything. However, my wife was not afraid of guns, but was dead set against having one in the house until after our daughter was born and someone attempted to break in our back yard even with the two Rotties trying to take their fingers off when they were trying to open the back gate.

A few child abductions later (in the local news) and a little convincing from me that she should get a good description of the man that stole her daughter so she could give it to the police when they finally showed up did the trick. A week or two later I purchased my first firearm, a Glock 22. After that it was only a few short months until she asked if I was going to get a CHL. Then it wasn't long after getting my CHL that she was asking me if I was carrying whenever we left the house and saying that she felt more comfortable when I was.

She still doesn't have her CHL/LTC and probably won't ever get one, but she's completely comfortable with me having what I have. She has come to shoot with me a few times and is competent. She's also comfortable with me taking our now 14y old daughter shooting. Our daughter even has her own rifle and handgun (in the safe). And my wife has bought me my Henry Golden Boy for our 10th anniversary and my Glock 21SF for one of my birthdays a few years ago. When BO was running in '08 and then again in '12 she asked me if there was anything I needed or would like to have before each election.

[Mavs00]

The only disagreement we had was earlier this year when more 30.06 and 30.07 signs went up, and I refused to enter a business that had posted both signs. I told her that I was not going to disarm, just to patronize a business that had competition that was more 2A friendly. She felt that I was being too paranoid, however with the recent attacks across this country, and around the world, I point out that the majority of them occur when the victims are prohibited by law from defending themselves. She has come to realize that although the odds may be small, that we will ever be in a situation that requires me to use my gun in self defense, she has begun to look for signs, has become much more SA whenever we go out, and if I am CC, she will reach over and tap my hip to make sure I have my gun, if she didn't see me put it on.
So, to make a long OP short, my wife is fully on board with LTC and is planning on getting hers soon. I don't know if she will carry daily, and will probably never OC, but I plan to support her all the way.

This is pretty similar to my experience, except my wife already has her LTC and regularly carries when she is by herself. She was/is much more casual about it then I am. Until recently, even when she was carrying, she was very quick to "disarm" and just leave it in the car if she came across a 30.06 sign so as to quickly be able to go about her business as normal. She would get annoyed on those occasions (which was about 95% of the time) that I refused to disarm and we'd have to go somewhere else. She somehow thought it was a little silly to be "inconvenienced" by having to pick another restaurant or other place of business, when we could just disarm. Recently, with all the turmoil in the world, she has begun to come around much more to my way of thinking. She also never used to carry if we were together and was just content to let me be "the protector", but I've noticed that she now has taken to carrying even when I am.

[vjallen75]

The only disagreement we had was earlier this year when more 30.06 and 30.07 signs went up, and I refused to enter a business that had posted both signs. I told her that I was not going to disarm, just to patronize a business that had competition that was more 2A friendly. She felt that I was being too paranoid, however with the recent attacks across this country, and around the world, I point out that the majority of them occur when the victims are prohibited by law from defending themselves. She has come to realize that although the odds may be small, that we will ever be in a situation that requires me to use my gun in self defense, she has begun to look for signs, has become much more SA whenever we go out, and if I am CC, she will reach over and tap my hip to make sure I have my gun, if she didn't see me put it on.

Same exact thing happened to my wife and I. My son had his birthday party at speed zone in dallas, this was my first encounter going into a business where I had to disarm. I was not happy about having to disarm but I was not going to miss my son's birthday. After the Orlando shooting happened she did A LOT of research, guys I mean a lot. Like how do research on holsters and firearms we want. After doing the research she did, she came to the conclusion that she would be more aware of these signs, she has even started asking me what they mean and how to spot them. And even told me she would try to be more open minded about entering businesses that attempt to disarm me. (Last week she even offered to go to half priced books, "the place I don't like" as she calls it, to get our children books they needed for school.)

She is terrified of guns because some of the men in her life she trusted were very negligent with firearms. My wife is now going to get her LTC and get a firearm to carry. I can say, that after being on this forum and being educated by you guys/gals, it has helped my wife and I make informed decisions to protect our family at all cost. She even wants me to get an AR-15 style rifle when we can afford to get one.

[RPBrown]

I have owned guns all of my adult life. When my wife and I first met, she had been around guns quite a bit but did not care to have one in the house. She was a little taken back on her first visit to my house when she saw my gun safes. When she asked about them, being the proud gun owner I am, I showed them to her. She was okay with the rifles and shotguns but not so much with the handguns. She wanted to know why I had to have them, yadda yadda yadda. I really thought that our relationship had come to an end at that point but we continued to date. Then I told her that on one Saturday we would not be going out until later in the evening because I was going to take my CHL class. Then it was why do you need that, yadda, yadda, yadda. I explained to her that she knew I had guns and if she was going to be a part of my life then she would have to accept that. Fast forward to 1999, we were married and she accepted the fact that I carried everywhere I was allowed.
She started paying more attention to the news and all of the meanness going on and then she started making sure I was carrying when we would go somewhere. Then, in November of 01 (Black Friday) she and some of her girlfriends and my grand daughter went Christmas shopping and were robbed at gunpoint in the parking lot. When she got home that night, she announces that she wants me to teach her to shoot and get her CHL, all of which was done and she has been carrying every day since.