longtooth wrote:All them Post Turtles are shiny & purdy.
Funny you should mention this but about twenty five years ago I had the ocassion to wax a real turtle with (you guessed it) Turtle Wax. No Foolin!!
Back then Wife and I owned a town house and my father in law was painting the trim on the back of the house. He was up on a single board scaffold between two ladders about six feet up with a gallon of rust red paint when our next door neighbor came out to "catch some rays" as she regularly did.
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Well father in law got as far out on the end of the board, toward the fence as he could to get a better view and over balanced the board. He quickly ended up spralled in the flower bed with a lap full of red paint.
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He got himself cleaned up after awhile but in the mean time our garden turtle walked straight through the puddle of paint father in law had left on the ground.
Wife had a fit about her now very red turtle recalling the guilded girl at the beginning of the Goldfinger movie and how getting painted all over will kill you.
I promptly rushed to the rescue with my trusty tooth brush in hand and after abit of scrubbing with soap and water (luckly for the turtle it was latex paint) I had the turtle paint free. Unfortunately now it was looking a little flat rather than glossy as before. Wife wasn't pleased about that either.
This is where the Turtle Wax came into play. Applied librially and polished out with a shoe brush it made an impressive difference and in double quick time the old turtle was as shiney as Gen. McArthur's helmet.
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The experience didn't seem to bother the turtle as it continued to show up regularly at the back door to be fed twice a day. After two more years we think it found the rotten place in the fence and escaped. We never saw it again.
Truth to tell I could just as easily have used Johnson's Floor Wax but I just couldn't pass up the opportunity to Turtle Wax the turtle. Regular people so seldom get a chance to make this kind of history in a lifetime!
This is usually my wife's tale about how "an Aggie waxes a turtle" when she's had a few too many at family gatherings and social events with friends and I am expected to grimace appropriately. But it's so seldom I get to slip it into a conversation I couldn't resist telling her favorite story.
Gerry
"With atomic weapons, as in many other things, knowing what to do isn't nearly so important as knowing what NOT to do." -- J. Robert Oppenheimer, 1946
Wisdom comes from reading the instructions. Experience comes from not reading them!