Zombie Armory

[Keith B]

What is amazing to me is we have a two page thread on a Zombie Armory.

[Bart]

ACORN keeps regestiring them to vote.

[A-R]

I thought the way to stop zombies was just to hit stop on the DVD remote or change the channel? Did I miss something?

Only yellow-bellied chickens turn off the movie just when it gets scary.

[A-R]

What is amazing to me is we have a two page thread on a Zombie Armory.

You just made it 3 ..... congrats

I've actually been enjoying this thread. Nice change of pace to discuss fake monsters instead of real monsters - anti-gunners - and fake politicians - Pelosi et al.

[Keith B]

What is amazing to me is we have a two page thread on a Zombie Armory.

You just made it 3 ..... congrats

I've actually been enjoying this thread. Nice change of pace to discuss fake monsters instead of real monsters - anti-gunners - and fake politicians - Pelosi et al.

Yeah, fake monsters are a lot less scary than the politicians! Some of the politicians give me nightmares!

[frazzled]

Yea but what if the politicans were infected and became zombie politicians?

[LarryH]

Yea but what if the politicians were infected and became zombie politicians?

Would we be able to tell the difference?

[Fangs]

Yea but what if the politicans were infected and became zombie politicians?

Then we could legally shoot them?

[Captain Matt]

Zombies? I'm going to need a bigger boat.

[mymojo]

Fro those who need to get in some practice killing zombies:

http://www.zombietargets.net/

[longhorn_92]

Zombies? I'm going to need a bigger boat.

How to Kill A Zombie:

10. Throw records
Doesn't really kill zombies, but it's one way to clean up a bad record collection.

9. Chainsaw
The chainsaw can cut through even the thickest skull and will destroy a brain in seconds.

8. Toaster
When swung by the cord, one can get incredible velocity; it also makes toast.

7. Hammer
Another popular tool. Good for the strong and weak alike, and perfect for the novice zombie killer.

6. Fire poker
Heavy, well sized, and very versatile, serving the stab-happy and blunt-crazy zombie killer alike.

5. Pump-action shotgun
Most movie characters are terrible with the shotgun, but it'll always be a popular choice.

4. The Old Door Trick
When zombies try to come in, slam the door on its head.

3. Rocket Launcher
Legend has it a U.S. college student wrote an essay called, "The Best Way to Kill a Zombie is with a Rocket Launcher." Who could argue with that?

2. "The View"
To kill a zombie, you must destroy its brain, and what better way to do that than listening to Joy Behar and Whoopi Goldberg?

1. Motorcycle
A must in any zombie invasion.

[boomerang]

Keep Austen Weird

That's not a typo. I was browsing Amazon when what to my wondering eyes should appear? Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

Product Description
"It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains." So begins Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, an expanded edition of the beloved Jane Austen novel featuring all-new scenes of bone-crunching zombie mayhem. As our story opens, a mysterious plague has fallen upon the quiet English village of Meryton—and the dead are returning to life! Feisty heroine Elizabeth Bennet is determined to wipe out the zombie menace, but she's soon distracted by the arrival of the haughty and arrogant Mr. Darcy. What ensues is a delightful comedy of manners with plenty of civilized sparring between the two young lovers—and even more violent sparring on the blood-soaked battlefield as Elizabeth wages war against hordes of flesh-eating undead. Can she vanquish the spawn of Satan? And overcome the social prejudices of the class-conscious landed gentry? Complete with romance, heartbreak, swordfights, cannibalism, and thousands of rotting corpses, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies transforms a masterpiece of world literature into something you'd actually want to read.

[Gyrogearhead]

Ok so we're starting to think tactical nuclear weapons here.

What ever happened to "One shot, one kill."? Oh, yeah, ther'e already dead. I forgot. So how about "One shot, one down."?

If we all went to the range regularly and practiced like we should we could all do that. Or at least "Two shots, one down." Maybe in my case "Three shots, one down."

So with thirteen plus one in the tube I should expect to get four of them before slide lock reload. Most of the films I've seen never show more than a dozen zombies at any one time so with two extra mags I should be able to survive long enough to reload the mags from my box of ammo. Since that's my usual carry then I'm good to go at all times. Funny how life immitates art.

[Cajundude]

Melee Weapons!

[ezenbrowntown]

I shouldn't even get in on this, but I'm gonna. While I understand the term "armory", let me lay out my preferences, assuming money isn't all that much of an option.



1. Helicopter: Is it as much fun? No. Is it the most safe? Absolutely. Until there is an evolution into flying zombies, that's my baby. So then, I can land it on or near.........


2. A boat: Not such good swimmers are creatures that decay. LOL. You never see them swimming in any movie, so get me a boat. A whole lot less work than fighting them off.

3. Heavy explosives: Rocket launcher/ C4/ Dynamite/etc. When the "enemy" seems to attack in a mob theory, the best way to dissipate a mob is to blow it up. Period. It doesn't make for good cinema, but it is highly effective.

4. Quick drying cement pourer: Preferably on top of a building. Lay down the foundation and stick them in their place. A zombie becomes a whole lot less threatening when it can't move.

5. Icy terrain: Zombies don't seem the most agile of adversaries, so I'd like my chances of getting away with the slipping and sliding all over the place.

6. An enormous tractor, covered in Vaseline: Gotta have something to keep them from climbing up the darn thing right?