mreavis wrote:I'm not married and I haven't had to do this yet. However, if you want my advise.
I wouldn't try to prove her wrong or change her point of view. In whatever words work best for you. Tell her simply that you respect her opinions and you will continue to do anything possible to help calm the issue for her. However, you feel responsible for her and your own safety. Because you love her and you want to continue to be in this world and spend time with her, you feel you must be prepared to provide this safety.
She doesn't need to be convinced that everything is perfect. Just that some things need to be done to prepare and secure things in life. And because the world is the way it is today, and not perfect. You could/would only blame yourself if something happened and you didn't do what you could to be prepared.
-- Thats how I plan to go about it when the time comes. I know it doesn't use math to say hey look its not a big deal. But I think it gets my real point across.
The only thing I'd add to this is... You don't really say "why" she's "uncomfortable".. You give us a lot of reasons why you think her discomfort is justified, but, have you asked her directly? Maybe your assumptions are wrong?
Maybe she's worried about the kids and agreeing/implementing a "kid safety plan" would alleviate the problem...
Maybe she's worried about having to explain to her family (who certainly suffered as part of her brothers tragic experience) why she "allows" guns in the house "after what happened to" her brother.? [This one would be my bet]
Maybe she's worried about her friends finding out her husband is a "gun nut".?
Your reasoning could be on-point, or, totally wrong... Until you have an open discussion about it, and figure out if there's really anything that can be done to mitigate her concerns, you're just guessing.
[insert joke here about how men are from Mars and women are from Venus
]Just my $0.02