TexasCHLforum.com

"I am trying to start dating and i need to know what some of you ladies think.
Should i be verry forth coming that i carry a gun? or never tell them at all??
manny of you gals on here im sure are no stranger to firarms and those of you that didnt grow up around them how did you feel about dating a guy that was packing all the time. did it scare you away???"

When Jason and I started dating I had never even seen a gun in real life. I was terrified of them. I remember talking with him on our first date, just getting to know each other, and realizing that he didn't just collect guns, he liked shooting them! We talked about our families, our hobbies, and all of the typical first date stuff. I didn't really know what to think about the whole "gun thing". By the end of that evening, I DID know that he was a pretty special guy and that I wanted to continue spending time with him. So I figured that I just wouldn't worry about the guns right then. He never mentioned his CHL that night. I don't think that I was aware that he carried daily for quite awhile. It was not something that was a part of my life, so it was not a question that it ever even occured to me to ask. If he had mentioned it, I would not have even known what a CHL was!

Over the next few weeks we spent a lot of time together and he finally asked the dreaded question...Why don't you come to the range with me? Of course, I was still trying to make a good impression - so I said yes. The day finally arrived and I came up with every excuse in the book about why I couldn't go. By this time Jason knew me well enough to know that I was scared and just wouldn't say it, so he didn't let me off the hook. He told me point blank that guns were a big part of his life, that they were ALWAYS going to be in his home, and that WE were going to have to figure out a way for me to be okay with that. He never pushed the situation off as something I needed to deal with. He made it about US - a team. We went to the range, I watched him for a little bit, and once I realized that he was in complete control of the weapon, it actually started to look fun. I even shot two different handguns that day! :-)

Three years later I was sitting in a CHL class while Jason was discovering his new "love" at the 2006 Texas State IDPA match.

All of that to say...when you find the right one ~ you will know when it is the right time to tell her. Start slow. Thinking back as I type this, if I had known that Jason was carrying on our first date I think I would have been very intimidated. Everything about the whole situation was already new, and I was already nervous. Add to that being faced with one of my biggest fears and I might have said - - thanks for dinner but this isn't going to work. Thankfully that didn't happen. We have now been married for 4 years and have a beautiful daughter.

"I also try to push any female i care about tword getting a CHL for their own safety. what are your thoughts on a good way to go about that??"

Encourage, but don't push. Jason was very wise in realizing that he was not the best person to teach me how to shoot. He got me a great instructor (plug for El Gato here) and let me take things at my own pace. He encouraged me to basically take responsibility for my own safety - whether that was a self-defense class, OC spray, a handgun, or all of the above. I can only speak for myself, but I don't like to be pushed or guilted into doing anything. I wanted to do it on my own terms and in time I did.

I know this was long, but hopefully it gave you the perspective you were looking for.

Kimberly