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You're not "flinching" from the anticipated recoil, so much as you're anticipating the trigger break. One of my firearms instructors refers to is as "make the gun go NOW syndrome." As you are pressing the trigger, you're "pushing" the gun down and to the left, just prior to tripping the sear. It IS a VERY difficult habit to break; I'm fighting the same tendency with my duty H&K P2000.

Best advice I can give is to obtain some snap caps, and load them in with your regular ammo while practicing (or better yet, have someone else load your magazines, so that you don't know precisely where each dummy round is). If you jerk the pistol when you hit a snap cap, notice where and how you're jerking it, and minimize that jerk. Your goal is to have a completely motionless pistol when you drop the hammer on a snap cap.

Run through a thousand rounds like this.

You'll notice a marked improvement in your shooting. I know I have (but I'm still not where I want to be).