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Bottom line is the 22lr is not the right choice. You know that from what others have said. The sr22 is still 18oz unloaded and not that small. I would take my 32acp kel tec anyday over my 22 handguns!

Here are some ideas.

Bersa Thunder 32acp -20 oz 32acp. Low recoil and yes the 32acp is way better then the 22.

All steel snub nose revolver 20-26 oz. In .38 special standard pressure round.

3.5 inch 9mm 1911. Low recoil

How heavy and what is your size limit?

My wife's first handgun was a Ruger Sp-101 in .32 H&R magnum with a 3inch barrel because she was recoil shy. Now her preferred handguns are 9mm 1911s. She wishes she started with the 1911 but she was just to inexperienced and scared of that big 9mm round.LOL Now she shoots govt model 45acp from time to time. It just takes time. She is only 4foot 10 inchs and she can handle a full size 45 and most 9mm that are shield size and bigger.