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but I can't stand the way they (don't) fit in my hand.

Exactly why I haven't bought one. I am very much allured to them (cleaning tongue with toothbrush) and have thought about buying one but I just can't get used to the feel or the grip angle.

I'm willing to bet that 99% of these "cleaning accidents" are just some idiot playing with his gun.

I bet they are too. G/f's brother left his loaded XD9 out in his apartment and steps out of the room for a moment (restroom) and some of his friends come over. One picks up the gun and starts playing with it and well what do you know, they now have a hole in the roof that came out near the kitchen table this lady was sitting at on the floor above them. She packed up and moved out the next day. Cops came out and no citation was issued, just a "be more careful."