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sugar land dave wrote:And the hits just keep on coming! I stand amazed at this start to a new week!

On topic, I think you made a wise move to quickly assess and move on to church without your firearm. Now that you have a little time, you two should quietly discuss the issue if it is that important to you. I will assume that you have not spent 21 years in a troubled relationship, so you should be able to talk to each other. Remember that life is compromises. You make them at work, and you make them in your PRIVATE home life. Talk WITH your wife. She's your partner. Congratulations on a long marriage!

Here's the deal.... I'm not going to presume to tell him how he must conduct his married life, but HE is the one who brought this question to this board, ASKING for input. If you don't want to see any input, I'd suggest you don't read this thread. Most of what has been offered here by way of solicited suggestions, has been offered entirely in the spirit in which it was asked for, meaning no disrespect to the OP or his wife. If anything I've posted here in reponse to the OP's question is objectionable to the OP, I'm sure he'll let me know. In twelve days, I'll have been happily married to my best friend in life for 23 years. It's not like I don't understand the institution.

If you don't want to see solicited suggestions offered, perhaps you should make suggestions to the OP about your opinion as to the propriety of asking for such help in the first place. But don't jump on people for responding, positively, to his request.

jmra wrote:If you haven't already, I would take her to the range and let her become friendly with your firearms. Stress the importance of her being able to defend herself if you are not around. Play the give and take angle, lets go to the range and then we can go...(something that she enjoys). I have yet to see anyone who after 4 or 5 trips to the range didn't start asking to go to the range. As she becomes more interested in shooting, the church issue will fade.

Better yet, suggest that as long as there are going to be guns in the house, she should know how to safely handle and use them. THEN, take yourself out of the equation and offer to find her an NRA Certified Basic Pistol instructor who has a lot of experience working with ladies. Then offer to stay home and watch the kids while she goes and has some fun without you hovering over her. I can practically guarantee that she will come home with a different perspective.

sugar land dave wrote:Wow! Poor guy posts about his wife not wanting him to carry to church and the group has interpreted this as marital problems and a prelude to divorce?

This is a tough crowd today! Welcome to Monday!

Not me. I not only made no comments on the state of his marriage, I'm the one who said, "Your marriage is a sacred trust. Above all, let peace reign there." That was a blessing from me.

I also pointed out some biblical rationals for the idea of carrying in church. I am pretty convinced that my biblical rationale is solidly based in the written scriptures, and in their spiritual intent. But at the end of the day, each married couple has to decide what works for them. I gave my opinion, but their mileage may vary. It's not mine to judge how they work out it. I can only speak for myself and my own marriage. I do hope that they are able to work it out to the OP's satisfaction, because I believe his position to be the right one.....from my perspective.

Blindref757 wrote:Today we hit a wall when I started to head out to church with my gun in my holster. She really threw a fit...she didn't see any need to be armed in the house of the Lord.

Blind Ref,

Again, meaning absolutely no disrespect, but I was just now reading your opening post to my wife, and my response to you posted earlier, just to see what she thought. When I got to the part of your opening post that I've quoted here, she started laughing......not at you or your wife personally, but at the idea that, with all the history of church killings in the past couple of decades, there are still people today who don't see the potential value in being armed at church, and that there are still Christian believers who think that guns in and of themselves are an offense to God.

Read to her from Luke 22:35-38

New International Version wrote:35 Then Jesus asked them, “When I sent you without purse, bag or sandals, did you lack anything?”

“Nothing,” they answered.

36 He said to them, “But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don’t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one. 37 It is written: ‘And he was numbered with the transgressors’; and I tell you that this must be fulfilled in me. Yes, what is written about me is reaching its fulfillment.”

38 The disciples said, “See, Lord, here are two swords.”

“That’s enough!” he replied.

Two comments about this scripture that you might share with her.....

1) Jesus essentially told his disciples "this is a dangerous world. Arm yourselves." In context, you have to understand that a man's cloak in that day was one of his most valued possessions. It kept him warm in cold weather; he slept in it at night as a blanket; he sat on it to get himself off the ground; it kept the rain and snow off of him. And yet, here is Jesus advising his disciples to sell one of their most valued possessions to finance the purchase of a sword if they didn't have one. Keep in mind that, in scriptural context, He was preparing them to go forth and spread the good news of the Gospel.

2) In verse 38, the disciples respond to Jesus, saying that they already have two swords among themselves. To put this in context, they are at the moment involved in the Passover feast, a holy sater, and having communion with the person whom they believe to be the Son of God, the Messiah, the Savior, the One charged with all spiritual authority............and they are armed in His presence. Apparently, that did not upset Jesus, nor did it occur to them that He would be upset. They had already brought the swords before the Passover feast started.

My own commentary: If that did not upset Jesus himself, then who am I to be upset about it? Who is your wife to be upset about it? I'm not saying that to be disrespectful, but merely to put things in perspective. We daily (or should be daily) asking through prayer for God's intercession in our lives, the lives of our loved ones, the lives of our church family, and the lives of the unsaved. Prayers for intercession includes whenever we find ourselves in extremis, with our very lives on the line. Sometimes, God intervenes directly in human affairs. Sometimes He sends an angel. The word "angel" literally means a messenger of God. Sometimes that messenger, that agent of God's will intervening in human affairs, takes the form of a spirit being. But most of the time, that angel comes in a human package—someone who God has directed according to His divine purposes to act as His agent in this world.

We believers are ALL called to be prepared to be that agent in the lives of others. This is not a duty which we are permitted to shirk. It can take many forms. It might look like simply bringing meals to the new mother's family while she recovers from childbirth. It might look like ministry to the homeless. It might look like hosting a VBS at your home. It might look like getting involved in a prison ministry. It might look like sharing Jesus in a coffee house. It might look like involving yourself in a Celebrate Recovery program. It might look like babysitting a single mother's kids so she can get to her job. It might look like counseling a couple who are struggling and contemplating divorce........................................AND.........................it might look like being the one who is prepared to stand in the gap with a gun in his hand on that day when some maniac wades into the congregation during a service and starts indiscriminately killing people in some satanically fueled rage.

I don't have to deal with this issue in my own life. My wife carries at all times herself. But if I were faced with your wife's objections, these are the things I would share with her. The Lord will guide your words and your thoughts if you surrender them to Him. Your marriage is a sacred trust. Above all, let peace reign there. But remember this: if you are both believers, then Biblically, you are the spiritual head of your family. Although Ephesians 5:21-33 charges you with living sacrificially for your wife, loving her as you love yourself, it also commands her to submit to you as she would to the Lord. You are called to that spiritual headship over your family, and you must not shirk that duty.

I hope this helps, and blessings on you and your wife.