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Amonix wrote:

CHLLady wrote:

Amonix, I'm speechless. Bite her cell phone? I guess it prevented her from throwing it at you.

No.... It didn't. Sadly.... The phone was not a phone it was a beat you into submission tool. As in "OMG YOU DIDN'T SPIKE YOUR HAIR TODAY?! REALLY?!"

After 4 years of that crazyness I decided my sanity was worth more.

Yes, and you're way better off without that bunny boiler. Now keep looking, the non-crazies are out there.

PhillRoath wrote:When I started here in Houston in January of 1987 (software for the Space Shuttle) one of the ladies that gave excellent instruction was named Libby Jones. She was a nice lady who late one night let a man into her home...

http://www.examiner.com/article/the-mur ... ibby-jones" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

So you ladies here, be as smart as you are nice!

Phill

Thank you for sharing this tragic story. This was not even a stranger, he was working for her. This has reminded me to CC while strangers are on my property legitimately. See, I learned something valuable again today.

Sawdust, I love the cornered cat site as well. Great resource! Thank you for working to change your students habits. It's a work in progress. By the Grace, we will not have to learn it the hard way. The most powerful learning tool is a real story from another woman, that always gets my total attention.

Amonix, I'm speechless. Bite her cell phone? I guess it prevented her from throwing it at you.

Excalibur, I'm gonna look on amazon for one of those. I really need something that breaks a beam and sounds an alarm, for my garage and sidewalk. I found some on amazon, but they were too cheap and wouldn't sound off. Any suggestions?

Well, I'd like to say that you lose the niceness the older you get, but that's not true. At least not for me. you just learn from your mistakes. It's something in my DNA, how I was raised, my personality etc. just seems too much too, but we have to fight this for our own good. I read something about a woman saying she needed to put on her 'itch face when she's in a higher level situation. I thought about it and told myself I could do this. Lol. I think I'll practice in front of the mirror. I have to see this for myself. Ha! I usually have my concentration/serious look on, but a witch face, hmm...

I'm glad you are taking this seriously. Prepared is not paranoid! Meanwhile, put a curtain/material over your glass door. If you can't sew or don't have a machine, use "stitch witch" to fold over and iron a nice seam. Use sticky Velcro to adhere it to your door. Get your dog at your side when you answer the door from now on.

Listen and learn from these great people here. They discuss things throughout threads that you may not catch until the 5th page. I have learned so much and even taught my hubby a few things he didn't even know.

Now keep reading that book. You are a woman on a mission. A victor who walks with confidence, not a victim. How's that for a pep talk? Lol.

LadyLightening wrote:Thanks for all the comments! Especially the ladies that chimed in! :) Everyone's contributed to things I hadn't even thought of.I have a quick question though. I had some young guys (very early 20s...if that) come to the door selling magazine subscriptions. I had been working in the backyard coming and going into the house every so often and the front door was unlocked. Doorbell rings and stupid me answers the door halfway with my gun in hand on the side that wasn't supposed to be visible. Once I realized I shouldn't be in "threat" mode, I told them to hold on and I closed the door and put my gun on the hallway table. One of the guys was pretty country and he asked me what kind of gun I had and if it was pink.... Pink holster!! They saw through it through the glass in the middle of the door. So I apologized a million times and decided to buy magazines that were ridiculously overpriced after I gave them an idea of why I answered with a gun. They were cool with it and laughed, asked to come into the house and finish paperwork and I let them in. Can I get in trouble for them seeing it? I know absolutely I would if I was outside my home but I was inside. I know I shouldn't of let them in either but I didn't come to my senses until after the fact.

You need a No trespassing/No soliciting sign, a solid front door, and a chain so that you don't open the door all the way... NO do not let them in. Women have to stop being so nice. Our safety needs to come first over offending someone's feelings. I say this because I KNOW I am guilty of this very thing. WHY do we do this after the fact? We have to put the brakes on first. WHY shouldn't you be in threat mode?! Your instincts told you correctly the first time, your brain made you change it!! You were 100% right to answer the door with your gun. Listen to your instincts. And don't apologize! In the book, I mentioned earlier, he tells you WHY you need to use your instincts! Do you know the kind of people who sell mags. Door to door are not the kind that have a good job history or a long one. I bet they hire anyone to do this, even ex-cons. Who's to say that on that day he decides to go bad again... We have got to change our way of thinking!

I had some man come to the door, which I did NOT open claiming to be from an electric company I don't have. He was very offended that I would not open the door. I could tell in the way he answered me. Oh well! Too bad, survey someone else! But then again, I did open the door to a guy trying to sell Direct Tv/Dish. He asked for a bottle of water, a pen, and 2 napkins to wipe his face. I accommodated him every time. I shut the door and he was not allowed in, but still I'm irritated with myself over this one. I'm too darn nice! Ugh! Then we put up the No trespassing/soliciting sign.

I'm so sorry to hear you are dealing with this scary situation! Here are some suggestions I thought I would do if in your shoes....

1. Read Gavin De Becker's Gift of Fear. He discusses stalkers specifically and how to manage them. An excellent and informative read. Prepare your mind!

2. Train, train, and more training with an instructor! its worth every dime! Learn your own limitations and your carry weapon's limitations and work through them. Learn the kill zones. Train to shoot 2 to the upper body, one to the head. Learn to shoot with your gun right at your waist! He might be very close and you may need to bring the gun in closer to your body. The instructor can show you how to do this safely.

3. Know your comfort zone! How close is too close? Do you need glasses? Have an extra pair in your gun safe or with your spare gun in case you can't get to them.

4. Know your home at night, walk around outside. Are there overgrown shrubs that could conceal him from the street as you drive up or allows him to hide and peep through windows? Plant some cactus at strategic points. Lol. Have flashlights at those special places you described. Make sure you have alarms on your windows. Motion sensor floodlights. I have solar powered, they're easy to install and don't require an electrician.

5. Have an emergency code word worked out with family and friends that means "Call 911! I need help!". That way if he's in your presence and you can't escape, but he allows you to answer the phone... * Find out info. on his cars and their plates, give this info to your parents and friends just in case, they can locate him or you in case of abduction.

6. Vary your routine! Shop at different grocery stores, use different routes to and from home or work.

7. Have mace with you for the times you can't conceal carry. Keep one in your car too.

And lastly, please get that gun on your person. I love wearing mine now. I have the Pistol Wear holster wrap and it has totally changed my perspective on carrying. I have SO much more confidence. It is incredible how much I've changed just from getting it out of my purse and onto my person. You will walk taller, trust me. Stay safe and keep us updated.