I didn't read through all of the replies to your post so disregard this if your wife has already made a decision. She is lucky that she has you to help her out with this. I was all on my own and very intimidated throughout the process but I finally decided on the M&P shield. It doesn't meet your 'no external safety' requirement but for what its worth, I love it enough that has replaced the shotgun under my bed. As far as I can tell, Im doing okay with it. Although I have very little experience shooting handguns and not much to compare it to other than rifles and shotguns, I really like it and am pretty accurate with it considering my lack of experience. I don't have a CHL so I don't carry mine but I have tried to conceal it in front of a mirror and found it a little difficult to do so. Im 5'2", 130 lbs and wear semi-tight fitting clothes. Ive had several jams and one misfire but Im using cheap target ammo. Im able to wrack the slide with quite a bit of effort but its pretty akward and sometimes too difficult when my hands start getting tired. One other thing that ive found is that the slide doesn't always lock open after i fire the last round but perhaps its the ammo or maybe this is just common in general? I am planning to experiment to find out what it likes.