TexasCHLforum.com

jmra wrote:

SQLGeek wrote:FIrst of all, congrats to you on a long relationship already. My wife and I dated for several years through high school and college and I think in many respects that has made our marriage easier (but still not easy!).

As far as the ring, I don't know either of you but my suggestion would be to disregard the typical advice you get such as "budget 2-3 months salary". That's a marketing ploy from the diamond industry (same thing as diamonds are truly rare). If you're not stuck on recent tradition, it may not even have to be a diamond if neither of you are the type that cares about that. My wife wanted a diamond ring so that's what I got for her after quite a bit of shopping around.

What I ended up doing was picking out a certified diamond that looked good and was a decent size but not extravagant and then had it placed in a setting I knew she would like. It wasn't very expensive or large but the clarity of the diamond made up for the size.

That said, once you're engaged, I highly recommend pre-marital counseling even if you're not religious. A good, honest assessment of your relationship with a professional will at least give you both a good footing for starting off your marriage right.

Good luck to you!

Great advice.
If you can't afford the ring, don't buy it. But don't go cheap and then expect to spend thousands on "toys".
Don't go to bed angry (especially in your first years of marriage). My wife and I had some very late night discussions in the kitchen, but the bedroom was a sanctuary of peace and tranquility. Worked very well for us.
Don't be in a hurry to have kids. My wife and I were married for 10 years before starting a family. It allowed us to do things for our kids financially that we would have been unable to do otherwise.