School Bans Strapless Dresses from school dance

[FishInTx]

Women and young girls can wear a strapless dress and still keep things properly covered. Arms and shoulders are not what we should be worried about. I get the gist of the intent but let's state it as it is. Don't dress like a stripper!!

[txglock21]

I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to disagree with most post above. I do not believe in the government (in this case, a smaller form of government, ie. ISD) telling me what I can and cannot wear. IMO this is the PARENTS job. While I do agree that I wouldn't want my 12 or 13 year old daughter wearing a "sexy-revealling" dress, thats my decision not theirs. Now there has to be some common sense used here. You can't show up in your underware or something like that, but we are talking about the same style of dresses, one with shoulder straps and one without. This sounds like a petty issue to me. Again, I'm not saying there should be NO rules or dress codes, but some are getting a little rediculious. Just my 2 cents.

[mamabearCali]

Many places have dress codes....where I lived as a child (near a beach) there were signs everywhere No shirt, no shoes, no service. This is not about gov't telling people how to dress, it is about learning decorum. If you choose to put your children under the authority of a school you and your child have to abide by their rules. If you don't like it take your kid out or don't go to the prom. There are alternatives. It is the parents job to oversee the child's education, if you delegate that to the public schools then they do have (limited) authority to teach your children what to wear. Requiring minimal straps and past mid thigh skirts is not ridiculous. Quite honestly my standards for skirts is quite a bit more modest....but that is me.

[txglock21]

Mamabear, our two oldest kids we pulled out of public education after middle school and home-schooled for their high school years because of their "rules". Both are now successful adults with families of their own. Our "late in life" child is in the 3rd grade in public school right now, but we now live in a different ISD than the older ones went to. Its like night and day. Anyway, my point was and I stated, I'm not saying there should be NO rules or dress codes, I'm saying some of them are petty and have no effect on my or anyone else's children learning what they need to learn. Please tell me how a girl with a full lenghth dress that has no shoulder straps at a prom going to affect any child learning what they need to learn. I respect your opinion, but just because mines different, my child should not go to the same school as yours? Like I said before, IMO there should be BASIC rules of the dress code based on common sense (I know thats hard to find these days) and after that, its the parents responcibilty to decide what clothes appropriate for their child to wear or not and let them know why certain things are not appropriate. A child learns more from their parents than from some stranger we call their teacher.

[bdickens]

All the problems facing kids today and this is what we're worried about?

I got news for some people: the middle-school girls could be wearing Burquas and the boys would still be distracted by them!

[The Annoyed Man]

Just being vulnerable and honest here, and trying mightily to stay within the board rules.......

At my old church back in California, I was once engaged in a conversation on a nice sunny day with one of the elder "saints" of the church. I don't even remember what we were talking about, but I was in my 40s at the time and this guy was in his 80s, and he was one of those old guys that a guy like me thinks, "If I can turn out like this guy when I'm his age, I'll know I've been doing some things right." Anyway, we were standing there talking, outside in front of the worship center on a beautifully perfect sunny southern California morning, and a teenaged girl walks by. Now, I'm talking, "barely" teenaged, because she was about 16 going on 25, and may Tijuana donkeys eat me alive for lying if I say that she was anything less that a California "10." I mean, she was FINE...........and her parents had let her go to church without enough fabric covering her skin, and that fabric which was present was too tight.

Now, I'm a red-blooded guy, and so is the old man I'm talking to. We both literally stopped in mid-sentence and swiveled our heads as she walked by us. I finally tore my gaze away, looked at my companion, and I was really embarrassed that I had caught myself so obviously checking out this girl's "goodies." The only saving grace for me was that this old guy had been caught in exactly the same thing. We locked eyes and I asked him, "does it ever get any easier?" He said, "no, it doesn't. I may be 85 on the outside, but in here [he taps his fist on over his heart], I'm still 18." We were both a little ashamed of ourselves, because this girl may have been a "woman" on the outside, but in her heart, she was still just a kid. I knew her from my work with the high school ministry, and for both myself and the older guy, it was a momentary weakness to think of a child in that way.

Fast forward to today........ My son got married just 3 weeks ago. He's 23, and their circle of friends were all people in their 20s. All of their friends were appropriately dressed for a wedding. My niece flew in from California to attend. She's a pretty 20 year old with an attractive figure, and the dress she wore to the wedding had evidently been airbrushed on and was SO short that she could not bend forward at the waist without being indecent. She later confessed to my wife that she wished she had worn something else because she had realized after arriving at the venue that, not only was she wildly inappropriately dressed for the occasion, but she also felt like, because of it, she didn't have the freedom to cut loose and enjoy herself—dance, laugh it up, whatever—because she was constantly having to tug at the rear hem of her dress to make sure she wasn't uncovered back there. I actually felt bad for her.

My niece's choice of clothing was the direct result of her desire to be "adult," and having a distorted idea of what "adult" means.......partly because her life is immersed in California culture which is accurately described by JALLEN; and partly because the culture at large has sexualized our children. As a culture, we have taught our kids that "adult" means "sexual," but that is only a small part of being adult. Being an adult involves a huge scope of behaviors, decision-making, and responsibilities. Sexuality is only a tiny part of it. My brother, her father, is not at all a religious person like I am, and he had a much more laissez-faire attitude about his kids' moral compass than I had about my son's. The good news is that she's a smart girl, and I think she'll remember the lesson learned. I doubt she'll wear that dress again.....and nobody said a thing to her. She arrived at the conclusion on her own.

Gender politics aside, it is undeniable that about 98% of us are made with a powerful drive to attract or be attracted by the opposite sex. People can exploit that or not, as is they are guided by their internal compass, but the indisputable fact is that this attraction is purely sexual. A woman's curves do NOT make me wonder if she is a great conversationalist, although the manner in which they are displayed may make me wonder if she has any particular religious convictions or moral standards. So what it boils down to is this.....and this applies to ALL of us: Guys, if you don't want me to think you're a nelly queen, don't dress and act like one. Girls, if you don't want me to think that you're a "working girl," don't dress and act like one. Conversely, if y'all WANT me to think of you that way, then by all means dress and act the part. It's your world, and I'm just a squirrel trying to get by in it. If you are a Christian girl who really does believe the tenets of the faith, then have a little mercy on your brothers in Christ and don't do that to us. You've been given power. Use it wisely. HELP me to have a right mind about who and what you are.

Carry on.

[Dave2]

Need a like button...

[Abraham]

Inappropriate clothing worn by girls, really?

Hhhmmm, what about boys wearing prom dresses?

Roughly, a month ago or so, the news featured a high school boy who'd campaigned to wear a prom dress (and won) and it seemed no one uttered a peep of disgust...or if they did, they did vewwwwey quietly...

So, us conventional folks only dare complain when it comes girls dressing inappropriately, (hey, it's a safe subject to rant about) but never dare say a thing about deviants, cuz that'd be politically incorrect...

[03Lightningrocks]

Does anyone else find it ironic, even a bit distressing, that the very same people who are fighting for the right to dress their daughters like little tramps are perfectly alright with the school forbidding things such as god? I realize it is somewhat normal for each generation to think the last one is lost but this time it is for real!!! Sorry folks but I have to say it. The whole country has gone to hell in a hand basket! Sorry mods... That was the nice version of what I wanted to say.

[03Lightningrocks]

Inappropriate clothing worn by girls, really?

Hhhmmm, what about boys wearing prom dresses?

Roughly, a month ago or so, the news featured a high school boy who'd campaigned to wear a prom dress (and won) and it seemed no one uttered a peep of disgust...or if they did, they did vewwwwey quietly...

So, us conventional folks only dare complain when it comes girls dressing inappropriately, (hey, it's a safe subject to rant about) but never dare say a thing about deviants, cuz that'd be politically incorrect...

As long as the boy wasn't dressed up like a hooker, it isn't the same thing. Was his outfit designed to say... "Hey big boy, look what I have to offer?" ... He made a fool of himself. I doubt very seriously his outfit was designed to stimulate provocative sexual thought.

[Abraham]

I'm sure his prom dress was in the highest taste.

Teenage drag queens are completely tasteful as long as their outfits are not provocative...sigh.

Next: Why the government should pay for teen age gender reassignment surgery.

All of the above in great taste as the sunset of what was once a noble country rapidly sinks into oblivion - while the non-aberrant stare slack jawed and compliant...

[JJVP]

Looking at the picture in the article, if those girls added two 1/8" straps to their dresses, they would be OK? Ridiculous rule if you ask me. One other question, does the rule only apply to girls? Can the boys wear strapless dresses? If so, it is discriminatory.

[Dave2]

Looking at the picture in the article, if those girls added two 1/8" straps to their dresses, they would be OK? Ridiculous rule if you ask me. One other question, does the rule only apply to girls? Can the boys wear strapless dresses? If so, it is discriminatory.

Dunno... Are Utilikilts strapless?

[mamabearCali]

Mamabear, our two oldest kids we pulled out of public education after middle school and home-schooled for their high school years because of their "rules". Both are now successful adults with families of their own. Our "late in life" child is in the 3rd grade in public school right now, but we now live in a different ISD than the older ones went to. Its like night and day. Anyway, my point was and I stated, I'm not saying there should be NO rules or dress codes, I'm saying some of them are petty and have no effect on my or anyone else's children learning what they need to learn. Please tell me how a girl with a full lenghth dress that has no shoulder straps at a prom going to affect any child learning what they need to learn. I respect your opinion, but just because mines different, my child should not go to the same school as yours? Like I said before, IMO there should be BASIC rules of the dress code based on common sense (I know thats hard to find these days) and after that, its the parents responcibilty to decide what clothes appropriate for their child to wear or not and let them know why certain things are not appropriate. A child learns more from their parents than from some stranger we call their teacher.

I understand what you say and I homeschool my children too. You are fine with reasonable dress codes based on common sense....how is straps and mid thigh skirt length not common sense? They are not picking out colors or themes or fabric or styles...there are thousands of styles within that framework. How is that not common sense?

To answer your question as to why a full length dress no shoulder strap is not a good idea is simply this.....a dress with straps is less likely to be pulled down if someone steps on it and is less likely to fall in the case of vigorous dancing (which is the norm at proms). It is a minimum standard to protect the girl and others present from embarrassment. Prom is not really about learning....it is a celebration. If we want to stick to learning then prom should not happen.