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Last weekend the 16 year old son of some friends of ours was assaulted in his front yard, after he was dropped off by a friend. This happened at 11:00 pm. They don't normally have problems in their neighborhood, but the police thinks it was a gang from another town. He is ok, but the police still have not caught who did it, and they probably never will. Our friends are anti-gun, well, it's mostly the wife; she won't let them get a gun, not even a shotgun. After this incident I asked if they are reconsidering purchasing a gun for their home. Nope. They won't even consider it, even though, these guys have not been caught. I think he's mad at me for asking. What's it take for people to realize that they are responsible for their own safety.

You can lead a horse to water…


Lots of this in my circle of friends. One even asked me to help clean up and check out his dad’s old shot gun, I have him a lock (as he has a tot) and the wife made him put it in a neighbors safe. Buddy was too embarrassed to tell me.

Another buddy is an avid hunter, and wants his CHL, but his wife does not want pistols in the house.

Some will just never get it.

I think much of it is a comfort level. I am not comfortable around pitbulls, , , many people swear by them.

In all three instances cited above, the woman is setting the rules.

Marriage is supposed to be about mutual undestanding and partnership, etc. or am I just an overbearing manipulative male chauvinist pig?

Oldgringo, I agree with you, and I'm a woman. It is a man's responsibility to protect his family. If a man, husband, father, whatever, will not man up and lets the woman make all the decisions then, IMO, he's worthless. I agree, that marriage is a partnership and there must be mutual understanding, but there is also a hierarchy: God, family, self. If the head of a household cannot or will not protect his family because a wife is dominating the relationship, then there will be chaos.

In our household, fortunately, we agree on just about everything, and what we don't agree on we come to an understanding on.

Over the past three score and some odd years, I've learned a lot of things - many the hard way. One of the things that I've learned is that people can't be convinced of anything until they're ready to be convinced.

Say your say and set a good example; if that doesn't take, keep on moving. Life is too short to waste much of it talking to stumps.

Oldgringo wrote:

Over the past three score and some odd years, I've learned a lot of things - many the hard way. One of the things that I've learned is that people can't be convinced of anything until they're ready to be convinced.

Say your say and set a good example; if that doesn't take, keep on moving. Life is too short to waste much of it talking to stumps.

Amen! I have been around for awhile myself and Oldgringo hit the nail on the head!

-geo

CJATE wrote:Another buddy is an avid hunter, and wants his CHL, but his wife does not want pistols in the house.

Is this just something he has mention to her or did he try explaining the options for safely storing it when it is not on his hip?

I am going to ramble a bit uncharacteristically here, because some of my ideas in this vein are not fully formed.

As others have said, you cannot talk someone out of deeply held beliefs or fears. The motivation for change has to come from within, or from some experience that the person cannot ignore or rationalize. As the saying goes, a neo-conservative is a mugged liberal.

Two aspects of this issue have to be separated:

• the need to provide for your own defense
• fear of firearms

The need to provide for your own defense is blindingly obvious to anyone who take his or her head out of the proverbial sand. Every week we can read in the newspapers about home invasion robberies, rapes, abductions, and other violent crimes that are launched with no advance notice.

People who deny this issue are fooling themselves, and pretty much have to become a victim before they realize the truth.

Fear of firearms is a different issue. It is caused by ignorance, such as thinking that "guns go off by themselves."

You can tackle this problem. You can invite such a person to a range to learn safe firearms handling and shooting. You can sell this idea by saying that even if the person does not intend to acquire a firearm or shoot, it's better to know how to handle one safely -- just as we pay attention to the emergency instructions on airplanes without every expecting to need to follow them.

A person who goes shooting, however timidly at first, usually comes to enjoy it.

If going to the range is too big a first step, you can try starting with AirSoft or BB guns, which many people (erroneously) regard as toys.

- Jim

If you lead a horse to water, he'll drink eventually.

If you beat him over the head, yell at him, drag him, he won't only not drink, he'll probably kick you then run away screaming.

To be honest, many of you folks I think would fail miserably, because you have such disgust for the thought processes of people considered "liberals" or "anti-gun" IF you're ever going to get the trust of someone, you at least have to try and understand their thought processes from an unbiased, neutral point of view.

If you think of these folks as "collectivist, leftist scum" than you'll never get anywhere.

The thing you'll need to realize is that the everyday person isn't evil because they are anti gun. They are wrong, sure, but they aren't evil. Many times, they are quite intelligent, thoughtful people that just never even decided to be intelligent, and thoughtful about guns.

That's the key right there. You have to plant a few seeds of doubt about the "guns are bad" dogma; engage the thinking process, and you're 2/3 of the way there already...

*EDIT* I'm not talking about politicians here; they are their own type of scum not covered here. I mean regular everyday folks.

Nitrogen wrote:

...many of you folks...

There's a pretty unilateral and elitist tone to your post. Are you not one of us folks OR are we not one of you folk?

Oldgringo wrote:

Nitrogen wrote:

...many of you folks...

Are you not one of us folks OR are we not one of you folk?

Many of you folk, on this board.

As far as who I am, I'm one of you as well as one of them. (not anti-gun, but yeah.)

I had a close relative and she was scared to death of guns..."I do not want that thing in my house"..."I don't my kids around any guns, period." I invited her to the range with us there were several going out to do some shooting. At first she stood way in the back and watched. After a few outings like this she became a little more at ease and she noticed the fun and joy on the faces of those that were shooting. Finally, I offered her to shoot my .22, and I was shocked when she said ok. With a little instruction and going over the safe handling of guns...she pulled the trigger. The first words out of her mouth was where did I hit, did I hit it!! She was hooked. It takes time, patience, gentleness. Don't try and force it, just let them change their mind a little at a time. Now she will shoot anything you hand her. They now have bought three pistols and a shotgun.

-geo

bryang wrote:

...Don't try and force it, just let them change their mind a little at a time...

Good approach AND with a .22 instead of a hand cannon at first.

bryang wrote:IShe was hooked. It takes time, patience, gentleness. Don't try and force it, just let them change their mind a little at a time. Now she will shoot anything you hand her. They now have bought three pistols and a shotgun.

Perfect example. It takes patience, as well as trust. With family and friends its easier. For people you don't know as well, its a lot harder, but not impossible if you can find something in common with 'em.

If you lead an animal to water and you can get it to drink, it is probably not a horse.

After many, many years of being single, after the end of my first marriage, I got married again. My second wife knew that I was a retired LEO and I had handguns. When we got married, she told me she did not want guns in the house. Too late, they were coming with me. Now I never flash them and she rarely sees them even though I always have one close by.

I have talked to her about going to the range and getting my pistol proficiency qualification to carry under LEOSA 2004. But I still keep them close by but out of her sight. One day she surprised me, she said that she wants to go to the range with me. So, I taught her the rules of safe handling. I showed her a .22, which she said was ugly. They I showed her my duty weapon. She liked it.

You never know. Sometimes the horse will drink when you least expect it to.