Hugging faux pas by a newbie

[Screamin Jimmy]

Hi all,

My wife and I went to a coffee shop the other night to hear a friend sing for open mic night. I had my Bersa Thunder .380 IWB at 2:00 under a Hawaiian shirt and no one was the wiser (except my wife). I'm not normally a hugger but while we were all standing around after the concert I gave our young friend hug and told her what a great job she did. I made sure it was a one-armed shoulder hug on my non gun side. Since we’re not close friends, plus I know how she was raised, I fully expected her to respond in kind with her arm around my shoulder. It never occurred to me that she would put her arm around my mid-section. And I didn’t realize I was skinny enough for her hand to wrap around as far as it did. But sure enough, her fingers landed right on the grip of my .380.

Of course she didn’t know what it was and pulled away immediately. I instantly reacted as well, and my becoming uncomfortable and embarrassed freaked her out and made her even more uncomfortable and embarrassed than I was. We stood there stammering as if we’d both done something wrong and my wife started laughing, which confused our friend even more. Finally after several awkward seconds (which seemed like hours) I decided I owed her an explanation. Not wanting to say out loud “it’s a gun”, I discretely showed her my recently acquired CHL and we all had a good laugh. We have a couple of mutual friends who carry, so I knew she would be OK with it after she understood what was going on.

Even though we laughed about it I’ll admit the whole thing rattled me so bad I could hardly drive home - I couldn't believe I let it happen. I will DEFINITELY re-think my hugging strategy in the future!

James

[interesting10]

Hi all,

My wife and I went to a coffee shop the other night to hear a friend sing for open mic night. I had my Bersa Thunder .380 IWB at 2:00 under a Hawaiian shirt and no one was the wiser (except my wife). I'm not normally a hugger but while we were all standing around after the concert I gave our young friend hug and told her what a great job she did. I made sure it was a one-armed shoulder hug on my non gun side. Since we’re not close friends, plus I know how she was raised, I fully expected her to respond in kind with her arm around my shoulder. It never occurred to me that she would put her arm around my mid-section. And I didn’t realize I was skinny enough for her hand to wrap around as far as it did. But sure enough, her fingers landed right on the grip of my .380.

Of course she didn’t know what it was and pulled away immediately. I instantly reacted as well, and my becoming uncomfortable and embarrassed freaked her out and made her even more uncomfortable and embarrassed than I was. We stood there stammering as if we’d both done something wrong and my wife started laughing, which confused our friend even more. Finally after several awkward seconds (which seemed like hours) I decided I owed her an explanation. Not wanting to say out loud “it’s a gun”, I discretely showed her my recently acquired CHL and we all had a good laugh. We have a couple of mutual friends who carry, so I knew she would be OK with it after she understood what was going on.

Even though we laughed about it I’ll admit the whole thing rattled me so bad I could hardly drive home - I couldn't believe I let it happen. I will DEFINITELY re-think my hugging strategy in the future!

James

Thanks for Sharing, I am waiting on mine to come in and I am definitely a hugger. I will be really on my p's and q's!

[Cedar Park Dad]

1. You need to perfect the "High/Low" hug as reflex now.
2. If someone does cop a feel (and a face) make fun of it with "you trying to steal my cellphone again?"

The only time someone grabbed and noticed, they thought it was an insulin pump.

[TheCytochromeC]

I go for the low hug always. I don't care if it's a 4' tall old family friend, my arms are taking the low road. It's weird, but not as weird as, "What's that?"

[Thomas Hagemeier]

Oh it begs the response.....

"No I'm not happy to see you. It's a gun."

[Charles L. Cotton]

Welcome to the Forum. Don't give it a 2nd thought and don't try to devise a good "hugging strategy." I hug people all the time at church, political gatherings, friends homes, etc. and it's not an issue. Of course, anyone I would hug knows me well enough to know that if they see me, I have a gun.

Of course, there was this time when a friend introduced me to a woman who very unexpectedly gave me a hug. I was more than a little surprised because she was from Boston and the few native Bostonians I know wouldn't hug their own father. She felt my gun and rather indignantly exclaimed "is that a gun!?" I said, "why yes it is and my two extra magazines are on my left side right here. With my holster on my right side and the mag holder on my left side, I feel as safe as I did in my Momma's arms as a child." She walked off in a huff and my friend and I had a rather good laugh -- at her expense.

Chas.

[RoyGBiv]

So far the only revealing hugs I've experienced have been from my kids. After a while they stopped ribbing me and it's been a very good conversation starter for lessons about reality and the need for situational awareness.

I hope I can be as smooth as Charles if I'm ever outed in a public place. That was pretty smooth talkin' Sir.

I think the key is... you should KNOW with certainty that you're not doing anything illegal. If you believe that in your heart and it comes to pass that you're outed, it's simply a matter of smiling and mitigating any overreaction from others. If your eyes get big and you look like a deer in the headlights, the people around you will tend to act differently than if you smile and calmly talk it through or walk away like it was nothing...

[AlaskanInTexas]

I just figure anyone who touches my gun will assume it is my rock hard core muscles...

[ScottDLS]

I just figure anyone who touches my gun will assume it is my rock hard core muscles...

That's the best one yet! Gonna use it on my wife (who will immediately know I am lying). Funny though half the time she doesn't know I'm carrying, but I pocket carry a .380 so I usually say it's my smart phone vice my muscular core.


OK...now do you know why Texas is the BIGGEST state? Well of course, cuz if you melt down Alaska, you git somethin' the size of Rhode Island.

When I moved from Rhode Island to the South in 1975, my third grade teacher armed me with the following.... Rhode Island is the smallest state, but it has 3 times the population of Alaska!

After that the only problem I had was no one in the South could understand me.... U know Caaahh, Yaaahhd.... they acted like I was retahhhded or something.

[Jim Beaux]

I was standing in line at a cafeteria and behind me was a rowdy little kid dealing his mother (and others) misery. Instead of disciplining she was begging him to settle down - and of course he was ignoring her. The kid need a good dose of whompumbutt.

The little beast then ran head on into the back pocket of my Levis and CLUNK! He stumbled away stunned, whining and rubbing the hurt away.....that was the pocket my LC9 was in! Took a lot of effort to keep from up laughing.

[jmra]

I was standing in line at a cafeteria and behind me was a rowdy little kid dealing his mother (and others) misery. Instead of disciplining she was begging him to settle down - and of course he was ignoring her. The kid need a good dose of whompumbutt.

The little beast then ran head on into the back pocket of my Levis and CLUNK! He stumbled away stunned, whining and rubbing the hurt away.....that was the pocket my LC9 was in! Took a lot of effort to keep from up laughing.

That right there is funny.

[Oldgringo]

The huggers know and understand. It's the gropers I'm concerned with...and they are out there.

[AlaskanInTexas]

OK...now do you know why Texas is the BIGGEST state? Well of course, cuz if you melt down Alaska, you git somethin' the size of Rhode Island.

When I moved from Rhode Island to the South in 1975, my third grade teacher armed me with the following.... Rhode Island is the smallest state, but it has 3 times the population of Alaska!

A better one is: "How do you humble a Texan?" Cut Alaska in half and make Texas the third largest state.

[Jim Beaux]

OK...now do you know why Texas is the BIGGEST state? Well of course, cuz if you melt down Alaska, you git somethin' the size of Rhode Island.

When I moved from Rhode Island to the South in 1975, my third grade teacher armed me with the following.... Rhode Island is the smallest state, but it has 3 times the population of Alaska!

A better one is: "How do you humble a Texan?" Cut Alaska in half and make Texas the third largest state.

Man that's just wrong.

[troglodyte]

Welcome to the Forum. Don't give it a 2nd thought and don't try to devise a good "hugging strategy." I hug people all the time at church, political gatherings, friends homes, etc. and it's not an issue. Of course, anyone I would hug knows me well enough to know that if they see me, I have a gun.

Chas.

Pretty much the same boat I'm in. If they know be well enough to hug me then they ought to know I've got a gun on. I occasionally get a random hug. They either don't know what it is or ignore it.