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I just love the caliber war discussions. They are fun spirited and technical enough to make the geek in me happy.

To me the choices come down to more about gun styles than actual caliber. Glocks are one notable exception, one basic platform for all calibers and sizes.

I like 9mm not so much because I think its a superior caliber but because I like the platforms. I carry 3 guns all 3 are SA/DA, the choice depends on what I am wearing and what mood I am in. 3 guns work the same way, have similar perceived recoil. The manual of arms is very similar for all 3 guns. All load the same way and the thumb safety are the same. Now I understand that a lot of people like 1911s and some of the finest handguns on the market are 1911s. But I never liked the hammer sticking out, the backwards safety, nor the limited loading capacity. My smallest gun has a 13/14 round capacity. Maybe 13 rounds is overkill but I like knowing they are there. This isn't about what is best, but what a gun totter can feel comfortable with and trains with. Others may prefer a small DA .380 because they can't carry a bigger gun comfortably. The best gun is one you train with and carry. I would confuse muscle memory if I swapped out DA with SA/DA with 1911 while training. So I stick with 1 platform.

I understand that there are some models of 45 trhat come in SA/DA but the choices are more limited and harder to find.
That being said, with 9mm it is even more critical to carry good quality self defense ammo. Ball ammo with a 9mm just has too many issues such as penetration and small wound channels.