WOW!!! Enjoy all of the comments and especially appreciates TAM's response.
I was a little taken aback by Petecamp's statement:
My opinion here, but you seem way too eager to pull your weapon and shoot someone. Consider carefully the terrible consequences of a "bad shoot." That is a far more painful lesson for your son to learn than anything he might have experienced that day. I have seen the aftermath of far too many gunfights, and almost without exception it is bad, very bad. If you have to shoot, be as sure as you can that you are in the right and try as hard as humanly possible to avoid it.
Eager to pull my weapon?? Eager?!?!?!? Are you kidding me? I look back on this event and the things that flashed through my mind was not one of "eagerness". I was realizing the consequences of this blowhard's actions could cause him his life if he were to advance on me. Where do you find "eager" in this situation.
I am wired to do the "right thing", which is help little old ladies across the street, help a hurt person, etc. I was this way before I had a CHL, the only difference is that I am licensed to carry a gun.
I have asked people to watch their language around not only my kids but other peoples' (even before I had children) kids. the NORM is not to have a potty mouth in public. I am not naive and think the kids wont hear it. By that logic, if people are showing pornography in front of my or other peoples' kids, then I should just "deal" with it so as not to cause a confrontation. That just doesnt make sense.
I politely asked the guy to "please watch your language around my son". It was a request. I didnt say "hey, you moron, shut up before I use my 1911 on you!!!". When this guy got agressive, my method of descalating was to ignore him and not respond to him (using the same logic in a road rage exchange....you simply ignore the person). When he grabbed the cart, he was trying to push it out of the way. I grabbed the cart to keep it between him and I as a barrier. I had my son there with me and was trying to also keep between him and the guy.
During this, I turned my right side towards him and my left was away (which is where my gun is). He had no idea (and I wasnt going to give him an idea) of that.
I did swallow my pride. I didnt do the "manly" staredown, I didnt take the cart and push it back at him, I didnt call him a pottymouth, I didnt shove the gun in his face. I did walk away from the encounter. I dont see where the "eager" comment comes in, but maybe I wasnt clear enough with what happened.
What I will say is that I will be reading/learning more about force and when I can use it. It does seem like the law is slanted against us average guys and that needs to be changed.
maybe mr cotton can make his seminars available on mp3. :-)
I am glad that everyone has made comments on this. It has given me some things to think about. I have actually thought about carrying pepper spray/taser....but I'll be honest, the 1911 is about all these britches can hold up