Frankly, I don't worry about it too much. My carry choice over the years has devolved to everyone's "lowest common denominator"........9mm Glocks. For those pistols, I have settled on the two following ammo choices: For my G17, G19, and G26, I carry Hornady +P 135 grain Flexlock Critical Duty. For the G43, I use Corbon 115 Grain +P DPX.....because I already had some on hand for another 3" barreled 9mm I used to own. The decision to carry Hornady was primarily influenced by that being the available choice at the time that I was buying, and by having previously been satisfied with its performance in other guns. Had HST been more easily available at the time, I might have bought that instead, but it wasn't.
By nature, the Glock pistols are very reliable. Whenever I have acquired a new one, I've run a box or two of FMJ through it to break it in and ensure that the gun functions, and then I've run a box or two of carry ammo through it to ensure that the ammo works in that gun. Being Glocks, none of them has malfunctioned with either kind of ammo. Accuracy has been typical for Glocks, which is to say, acceptable combat accuracy. In other guns where I have had some reliability issues, those issues cropped up almost immediately during break in. In the Kahr pistols I've owned, the problems went away after 200 rounds......just like the factory said they would. The Glocks have never really required any break in. A 3" Kimber 1911 I used to carry did require a break in. With 1 exception, the other 1911s I've owned came to me used, and break in was not an issue. The exception was a 4" Sig GSR 1911, which I got rid of because I never could get it to function reliably, regardless of ammo choice or magazine brand. Like my Glocks, neither my XDM or XDS appeared to need a break in. Similarly, my M&P45 and a USP Compact .40 I used to own were all dead reliable right out of the box, and never hiccuped.
For my .45s.....which I rarely carry anymore.....I've settled on 230 grain Federal HST, except for my XDS45, which I load with 185 grain FTX Critical Defense (900 fps/333 ft-lbs, from a 3" barrel).
But I established a long time ago what ammo works and what doesn't in my guns, and I long ago established the guns' reliability. Lately, I could use more range time, but have been unable to get to the range for various reasons. Consequently, my ammo consumption is way down.
Anyway, it seems to me that pretty much all of the modern, better quality polymer framed guns (Glock, S&W, Springfield) are omnivorous, and the problem is less one of mechanical reliability, than it is one of the accuracy of a given cartridge in a given gun, and a matter of picking a load and bullet that will best accomplish whatever your needs are. I like the HST and the Critical Duty because they appear to be more "barrier blind" than other bullets ....at least under gun-writer testing..... but in the end, you never really know how the bullet is going to perform until you can recover it for examination. I simply trust that most people don't want to be shot, and will behave accordingly, and I trust that most ammo will perform well enough to stop someone if you have to shoot them.
So my advice is, do give it some thought, but don't over-think it.