TexasCHLforum.com

A lot of good advice in this thread, and you seem to be aware of most of it already as well.
+1 on the gun safe
+1 on getting a proven gun that you are familiar with
+5 on getting the wife comfortable with the idea of having a firearm in the house, and on getting her to a class about it. Conflict w/family members seems to be a reoccuring theme with gun ownership, and I personally think that some timely discussion and education is the best answer to it. Don't try to do it all by your lonesome though, give Crossfire a call-I've heard good things about her.
Last but definitely not least, refer your wife to http://www.corneredcat.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;. For that matter, you ought to go over there and read it yourself.