It appears you've been in the US for awhile, but since I am just now aware of it -- welcome! Since you said you were in the Dutch Military Police, I am guessing you are originally from the Netherlands. I spent a lot of time in the Netherlands when I was stationed at NATO Airbase Geilenkirchen on the western German border (right across from Brunssum), and I really enjoyed it. Welcome to the US and welcome to Texas.
As to your wife -- hmmm. I regard fear of guns (as opposed to respect for what it can do) as a bit irrational, and it is hard to logically convince someone whose position is not based fully on logic. That being said, I think slow and steady (and safe) exposure is primarily the best route.
This is a good rule:
I have a GunVault also, and think it is a good solution.ClarkLZeuss wrote: I would suggest this at the very least means a gun safe, and that you adopt a very strict rule: a handgun will only be found one of two places: 1) On my hip, or 2) In the safe.
The best thing you can do for yourself and for her is to get some quality training , not only for "shooting" but on administrative handling -- loading, unloading, holstering, drawing from the holster, and so on. I know you were in the military -- as was I -- but I have found a number of civilian trainers and courses that far exceed my military training.
Best wishes to you, hope your green card and citizenship applications go smoothly.